Snooping Isn't Polite
by Dolphingirl32173
Summary: Stefan's spending the weekend hunting. Elena shows up at the boarding house to confront Damon about snapping Jeremy's neck only to find the boarding house empty. So she decides to wait for the blue-eyed Salvatore in his room, where she stumbles upon the journal he once mentioned keeping. And curiosity gets the better of her… besides, he's read her journal! Damon/Elena
1. Caught Ya

Snooping Isn't Polite  
DG32173

Sarah: couldn't get this out of my mind so I had to write it down. I hope you enjoy.

_**DISCLAIMER**_  
I don't even own the theme, so how can I possibly own The Vampire Diaries? The answer is I can't. I'm just a broke girl writing fanfics for my amusement and posting them online to share my creativity. I'm not even getting paid to write my fanfics.

_**WARNINGS**_  
ALTERNATE UNIVERSE! Set shortly after Damon snaps Jeremy's neck but before the trip to Duke in Season 2. Rated M for my sanity, not that I have any.

_**SUMMARY**_  
Stefan's spending the weekend hunting. Elena shows up at the boarding house to confront Damon about snapping Jeremy's neck only to find the boarding house empty. So she decides to wait for the blue-eyed Salvatore in his room, where she stumbles upon the journal he once mentioned keeping. And curiosity gets the better of her… besides, he's read _her_ journal! _**Damon/Elena**_

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Chapter 1  
Caught Ya

Elena groans when she sees Damon's car is gone as she parks in _her_ spot in the driveway to the boarding house. "No matter, I have a key. I'll just wait for him," she tells herself. With that,, she gets out and locks her car before making her way into the boarding house. She makes sure to lock the front door behind her. _She's_ not a vampire. _She_ can't defend herself should some bad guy come calling.

She takes a deep breath before climbing to the second floor and making her way to Damon's room. Though she's never actually been _in_ his room, she knows where it is. It's literally the farthest room from Stefan's that the boarding house allows. Any closer and the brothers would probably kill each other from sheer annoyance.

Elena pauses outside Damon's room, her hand on the doorknob as she tries to get up the guts to enter the temperamental vampire's domain. "For Christ's sake, Elena. He won't kill you for being in his room," she tells herself, turning the knob. "He might try a little harder than usual to seduce you, but he won't kill you."

She pushes the door open and takes in the simple elegance of Damon's room. Damon keeps his room extremely neat compared to Stefan's room. Sitting at an angle from the door in the middle of the room is a king-sized mahogany four poster bed. It's meticulously made. Beneath the bed is a Persian rug. Probably the real deal rather than a look-alike. To one side is a huge fireplace. Next to the bed is a single drawer nightstand with just _one_ pile of books in front of it. A few of the books had toppled off the stack and trail towards a full-length mirror.

A quick check proves that the one of two sets of doors leads into a huge walk-in closet and the other set leads into an en-suite bathroom. On the wall opposite the bathroom and closet is a huge fireplace. There is currently no fire going, so that tells Elena that wherever Damon has gone, he hasn't been _here_ in a while. Damon's ridiculously fanatic about keeping a roaring fire going in the room he's in when he's in the boarding house., as if he'd get cold without one.

Elena sighs, raking a hand through her hair. She has no idea how to track him down. Besides, she'd prefer this conversation be held in private where no one else she cares about can get hurt. So she'll just have to wait. She decides to pass the time by seeing what books Damon likes. As she approaches the stack of books that are most likely first-editions, she notices a leather-bound book laying _on_ the nightstand, separate from the other books. Frowning, she picks it up. That's when she sees the initials engraved on the cover: _D.S._ She immediately recalls that Damon had once mentioned that he had once tried to keep a journal. This must be it.

Elena makes herself comfortable on Damon's bed, noting that the sheets are _not_ silk, as she had expected. But then she forces her attention back on track. Curiosity about what could be inside this journal is eating her alive. She has _never_ been one to so blatantly invade someone's privacy. Then she reminds herself that Damon had had no qualms about reading her journal and leaving her little comments at the end. 'Fair's fair,' she decides, flipping the journal open to the first entry. She begins to read, noting that it was written just after she had convinced him to trust her again by taking her necklace off and telling him he could compel the truth from her.

_You know, I've never been one to keep a journal. That's for Stefan and Elena and other people eaten up by emotions. Ah yes, Elena Gilbert, the very reason I decided to start one of these damned things. Normally, I keep my thoughts to myself and completely ignore my emotions. Vampires work on instinct, not emotions. Emotions get you killed in this un-life._

_I came back to this godforsaken town with one goal in mind: free Katherine. That has been the only thing that's driving me these past hundred-and-forty-five years. And the time I can free her is soon._

_But pretty much as soon as I came to this town, I met Elena. At first I mistook her for my lost love, they look that much alike. I quickly realized that this look-alike was human. Human! Anyways, that was a while ago. Stefan got to her first. I taunted him, flirted with her. I only realized that something was different about this girl when she fucking slapped me! I had smelled the vervaine as soon as I got close to her, but I was certain I could seduce her away from my brother. The vervaine would force me to work harder, but I've always liked a challenge. Only she shocked the hell out of me by slapping me for attempting to steal a kiss. No woman has __ever__ slapped me, Damon Salvatore, in my life._

_That's when I realized that this girl was more extraordinary than just her uncanny resemblance to Katherine. Hundred-and-sixty-nine years walking this planet, seducing women and no few men. And even thinking about it now, all these weeks later, my cheek still stings at the memory. That girl packs one powerful swing._

_That only upped the ante for me. I continued working my charms and good looks to my advantage. I used her best friend as a walking happy meal for a time. Man does that girl __ever__ shut up? Let's skip the unpleasant walk down memory lane. Anyways, Emily, the bitch, betrayed me and destroyed her own crystal to keep the tomb from being opened. I stood true to my word to the bitch and made sure her bloodline survived through the years. That bitch __owed__ me for the trouble I went through to make sure her bloodline flourished after she was burned. I kept my word, __counting__ on her to come through for me in the end and reunite me with Katherine. Then she betrayed me, possessed her youngest descendant, and used the girl's body to destroy the crystal. To say I was pissed is an understatement. If Emily couldn't hold to her end of the deal after all the trouble I put myself through, then I decided I should show her how I repay betrayal. I lunged in to drain the girl, Bonnie, of her blood and strengthen my already formidable Power. But brother-dearest and his oh-so-lovely girlfriend leaped in and ruined that plan. Still, my Power grew a bit. Not as much as it would have if I had drained the girl completely, but some growth is better than none._

_I was about ready to pack my bags when I found a link that promised he knew a group that wanted the tomb open as bad as I do. So we set up a meeting and I made it _look_ like he got away from me for the good Sherriff. But as I was waiting to meet him, get the information he had, and kill him for unloading all those wooden bullets into me, I got a call from Liz to thank me for killing him. What. The. Hell? Still haven't figured out who the real slayer is but boy was I pissed._

_I had only one option left to me: Bree. But as I was making my way to my car to make an immediate trip to Georgia, I heard a crash. My first thought was 'lunch'. That is until I recognized the vehicle that was laying on its roof with the tires still spinning: Elena's SUV. A quick take of the scene showed me the sequence of events. Elena had been driving away from the boarding house as fast as she could when a vampire decided to use one of the more painful tactics in stopping a car: standing in the middle of the road. I managed to chase him off before he could get to Elena._

_She smelled of my brother and no longer smelled like a virgin. I was I little pissed that I wasn't her first. But that she was out on the road instead of in Stefan's room told me that baby bro had royally screwed up. Then she pulled the complete damsel-in-distress and fainted in my arms. But first she whispered four little words that told me __exactly__ what Stefan did wrong: "I look like her." Baby bro, you don't go keeping from your girlfriend that she looks __exactly__ like your ex. Most people would call that a no-brainer, but apparently my brother's not that smart._

_Well, I was stuck with an unconscious girl in my arms who was badly hurt by little bro. I couldn't just leave her there to be feasted upon by that vampire that caused her crash. So I took her to Georgia with me. And we had fun. She surprised me by just how much alcohol she could hold. I was trying like hell to get her drunk, but she held her own too damned well. What was she like before her parents' died? That question has crossed my mind more than once._

_So when we came back, Stefan managed to sweet-talk his way out of trouble. Soon after, I revealed to the lovebirds my new plan to open the tomb, given to me by Bree before I ripped her heart out. The grimiore. Ah, that lovely book of spells. I felt like I could actually trust Elena, which made her the first person to earn it since I was human. I placed my trust in her when she told me I could trust Stefan to help._

_Big mistake. As soon as I figured out where the grimiore was hidden, or, rather, buried, I headed straight for Father's grave. And what do I find but little miss liar and her boyfriend. I have to admit, I felt rather betrayed by her. She knew damn well that I just don't _give_ my trust to someone. Stefan had the grimiore in his hands. I knew the only way I would be able to take get it from him was if he thought I would bring harm to Elena. At that point, I could care less what she would think of me. She lied to me, she deserved what she got. So I used my vampire speed and snatched her up and held her against me a good distance from her doting boyfriend. I threatened to snap her neck and kill her. Stefan called my bluff. I may have been pissed that she broke my trust, but I cringed at the thought of actually killing her. But then a much more appealing thought entered my mind. Turn her into a vampire. So I told him exactly what I would do to her if he didn't give me the book. He was taking a little too long to think about it so I bit my wrist and pressed it against her mouth, forcing her to swallow my blood by blocking her off her nose. Stefan realized just how serious I was and handed over the book. He can't stand the thought of anyone joining the undead, whether they wanted it or not._

_That was last night. I find out today Elena had been kidnapped as soon as Stefan got her home. So what if Anna killed her? She'd come back. Then who walked into the library this evening but little miss captive. She told me that she had convinced Stefan and Bonnie to help. Psh, how can I believe that when you already lied to me once? Then she blew my mind by taking off her necklace, setting it down, removing her hand, and challenging me to compel the truth from her._

_And here I was thinking she was smart. I could have used that little opening she gave me to turn her into my dark queen so easily. I was sorely tempted to do just that up until I looked in her eyes. She had lowered her walls and let me have a peek at who she really is. That's when I realized what was going through her mind when she had gone with Stefan to retrieve the grimiore. She wanted to protect those she loved. And dammit if this girl didn't have more love in her than Jesus Christ himself. How can __anyone__ love that damned much? I saw in her eyes that she was putting her full trust in me. So I decided to give her one more chance, telling her so as I put the necklace back in its place around her neck._

_She left me here with a lot of thoughts racing around my head. This human girl draws me towards her like nothing I've ever known. And she's not even __mine!_

Elena continues to the next one, this one written after the bachelors' raffle where he had taunted Rick, not realizing that he had been inadvertently taunting Elena as well.

_Well, hell. My big mouth came around and bit me in the ass and just might have cost me Elena's friendship. I'm Damon Salvatore, a fucking vampire, and I'm worried about losing a human girl's friendship. But, the truth is, she's the first friend I've had since Katherine-the-bitch waltzed into my life in 1864 and turned Stefan and I against each other._

_The only friend I have right now and I could very well have lost her friendship because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. If I had listened to her attempt to tell me about her research into her birth mother, I wouldn't be feeling like such a dick right now. Sure, I like to make people __think__ I'm a dick. But, really, it's all an act to keep people at bay. And Elena seems to be the only one who can see through the act I've perfected since I turned. Seriously, what's with this girl? All the things that others take as a sign to keep away only seems to draw her in! Does she have no self-preservation?_

_Then Stefan filled me in on what happened right outside The Grill, the message Isobel sent Elena. Damn the bitch! I __should__ have killed her! Elena doesn't deserve this! She's just trying to reach out to find out about her birth parents. She just wants to find a way to get parental figures back into her life. She's just a teenager, for Christ's sake! She was supposed to have a few more years with the parents who loved and raised her before having to go out into this world. This isn't the nineteenth century, where you were considered an adult at sixteen!_

_I'm going to have to grit my teeth and apologize to her. I don't do apologies, but I owe her more than I care to think about. She's been like a light in these shadows I've lurked in for so many decades. She's doing her damnedest to redeem my ass, and I'm finding myself unintentionally fighting her every step of the way. I hate apologizing for something I've done. I normally don't regret my actions anywhere __near__ enough to even consider apologizing. But Elena's changing me. I just hope she knows what she's doing cause I sure as hell don't._

Elena keeps reading, shamelessly immersing herself in Damon's private thoughts. Then she arrives at the one he wrote the night he killed Jeremy. And all her questions are answered as she finds out just how much damage she had unwittingly inflicted on him.

_You know, it would be so goddamn easy to find a nice sunny spot and take my damned ring off. It would hurt a whole lot less than hearing pretty much the same thing from two women with the same face and voice. I was so damned willing to forget all about these decades Katherine played me the fool if she just said it was me she wanted. Okay, not really, but that didn't stop the pain when she said that it had always been Stefan. Turns out she just wanted a little roll in the hay with yours truly with no emotions involved. Not happening. I tossed her out, got lost in the bottle for a whole day, and wound up in Elena's room, determined to make her admit the feelings I know damned well she has for me. I'm not blind and I'm __definitely__ not stupid. But that backfired in my face. It will always be Stefan, she said._

_Dammit, what the hell does he have that I don't? I can have my pick of girls in this world, but when it comes down to the ones that really matter, it's __Stefan!__ The alcohol and the doubly-broken heart turned tonight down a road it should never have gone. I was overwhelmed with the urge to lash out in my pain and Jeremy was unfortunate enough to show up at the worst possible time. I ended up snapping his neck._

_I can't get Elena's cry of grief out of my ears. I was frozen to the spot as the reality of what I had just done came crashing down. Then I fled back here to the boarding house faster than I've ever moved in my life. Elena had broken my heart and I retaliated by snapping her brother's neck. Dear God, I pray that he was wearing a Gilbert ring. If he wasn't, I will never get her back after this. Maybe I should just take off my ring and let sunrise end it all. How can I trust __myself__ after this? I've never lost control like that. Never. I've always been the one who kept in control no matter what. Things would be so damn easy if –_

"You know, snooping isn't polite," Damon's voice crashes through Elena's concentration. Elena jumps, dropping the book. She puts a hand to her heart. Damon merely walks over and lays down on the bed next to her. "But since you're so close to the end, you might as well finish," he remarks.

"Damon! Make a noise next time!" Elena says raggedly.

"Elena. Vampires don't _make_ noise unless we actually _work_ at it," Damon retorts, tucking his arms behind his head. "So, you gonna finish reading that or are you going to get to why you're here in the first place?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" she demands.

"Tell you what? That Katherine fucked with my mind? Yeah, no. I don't go for the whole wearing my emotions on my sleeve," Damon says, closing his eyes in an attempt to ignore her. As if it would be that simple.

"No, you prefer to drown your emotions with alcohol and end up doing stupid shit," Elena snaps.

She raises a hand to touch his cheek but his hand lashes out and grabs her wrist, preventing her touch. "Just because you now know what was going doesn't make things any different, Elena," he says, keeping his eyes closed. "You said it would always be Stefan. Don't go changing your choice just because you now know what that bitch did barely twenty-four hours prior to that." He opens his ice blue eyes and locks gazes with her. "But don't go thinking that I don't know what you _really_ want, Elena," he sneers, sitting up until his face is inches from hers. "I know you better than he ever will. You and I, we're more alike than you want to admit. I've seen your inner fire. I bring it out in ways he can't even comprehend. I know damned well that _you've_ seen the disappointment that shines in his eyes when you try to shrug off all that grief and guilt you've been lugging around since your parents died. I know damned well how much that disappointment hurts you. But I'll let you in on a little secret. If Stefan _really_ loved you, he wouldn't want you to carry that burden around forever. But then, it's not really a secret because you already know that. Doesn't it make you wonder what he'd do if you gave up fighting who you _really_ are? Give up fighting against the inevitable return of the girl you were before the night your parents' car when off Wickery Bridge, Elena. Stefan's the only one who doesn't understand that this girl we've been seeing these past few months isn't all there is to you. Believe me, that's not love. You can't love someone when you refuse to accept all sides of them. That's just painting a pretty picture of them in your head and falling for the picture. Take it from someone who knows that first hand." With that, Damon releases her wrist and lays back down on his bed. "Put the journal back on the nightstand when your done with it," he says softly, closing his eyes.

Elena frowns but knows that is all she's going to get from him. She sighs as she realizes that Damon's words ring unnervingly true. She has seen the disappointment in Stefan's eyes the few times her grief and guilt had slipped enough that her true self had shined through, however briefly. And it _had_ hurt so damn much to see that disappointment in who she truly was.

Elena picks up the journal again as Damon relaxes on the bed next to her. She debates over whether she should finish reading it. Damon had actually caught her in the act of reading it but he had actually invited her to finish reading it. She decides she should just accept that invitation because he would have killed pretty much anyone else who had delved into his privacy like that. He's always been so damned honest with her, almost brutally so. As she thinks back on it, she realizes that she can't think of even one time he has blatantly lied to her face. Even his comments about why their names being on the town charter when Elena first read it were the truth of sorts. Their original selves, their human selves, must have been different from who they are today.

Elena sighs again and flips the journal to where she had left off.

_Things would be so damn easy if I could just flip the switch again and be done with these human emotions. But Elena went and broke __that__, too. How can one human girl be so much trouble to me when I could so easily break her like a toothpick if I wanted to? The problem is, the very thought of doing that makes both the man and the vampire in me cringe. I have never felt so damn strongly for someone in my life. The blind devotion I had for my sire might as well been sheer hatred compared to __this__ tangled web of love, passion, and friendship I have towards that human girl._

_And the only thing that's really keeping me from ripping off my ring and letting the sunrise turn me to ash is the fact that I know damn well what it would do to Elena. She may hate my guts right now, but she would be broken if I killed myself. More broken than her parents' death had made her. I know her too damn well. I've memorized every nuance of her facial expressions and body language, every tone her voice has taken, and what it all means._

_What really made me snap wasn't the words she said, it was the fact that her eyes were begging me not to press the subject of her feelings for me. She's scared of how she feels for me and that pissed me off like nothing ever has. If she's so damned determined on drawing out the human in me, then why the hell is she fighting the fact that she and I complete each other in ways Stefan only __wishes__ he could complete her? As hard as it is to admit, Elena Gilbert is my humanity. There's no denying it._

_If I can't have her is __mine__, then I'll have to settle for at least getting back the easy friendship we had. Even if I do get our friendship back, that doesn't mean that I won't keep trying to prove to her that I'm the one she belongs with, not my pansy brother who doesn't even __like__ the girl she really is. He thinks that the flashes of fire we've seen in her are signs of my corruption of her._

_Psh. Stefan doesn't believe what all her friends are saying, how the Elena we know isn't the real Elena. He has this pretty picture painted in his head of her and is in love with that image. Same way I had a pretty picture in my head of Katherine. Well, the bitch dealt the deathblow to that image herself by admitting that she had honestly been using me. Elena needs to prove to Stefan that the image he has of her __isn't__ who she really is. Preferably not the way Katherine did to me. Even with all that lies between us, I wouldn't wish that kind of pain on Stefan. He's sill my little brother. I'll protect him with my life. Shh, don't tell anyone. Can't have them thinking I'm getting soft._

There's a scrawl of ink after that before the entry picks up again.

_Shit! What the hell has little brother been eating this time? I wasn't __that__ lost in thought that I could have missed the sound of his arrival. Anyways, he brought news that Jeremy was wearing the Gilbert ring. That's one worry off my mind. He tried to find out what's going on with me, but, seriously, he's my __little__ brother. No way in hell am I going to get all emotional with __him__. Elena, maybe, but that'll have to be after I get her friendship back._

Elena turns her eyes towards Damon and is startled to realize that he had fallen asleep next to her. That, or he's doing a damned good job at faking it. She doesn't bother trying to find out which it is. She turns back to the journal and goes to the next entry.

_Well, this is fascinating. Little Gilbert decided to break into the boarding house with a homemade stake. Seriously, what is __wrong__ with people these days that they've forgotten how to whittle? Anyways, Jeremy had already decided to give up on the whole "stake-Damon-in-revenge-for-killing-me" plan before I arrived. That's a good thing, cause I __really__ don't feel like explaining to Elena why I snapped her brother's neck a __second__ time. Oh, I'd leave the ring on, but it wouldn't make her hate me any less._

_Those two may actually be cousins rather than siblings, but they're both damned reckless. It's actually a miracle they haven't faced serious trouble before Stefan and I showed up. Who knew a couple of humans could be such danger magnets? Not only do they attract it, they actually go __looking__ for it! What sane person goes __looking__ for trouble when they've already got a ton of it on their plate? No one! These Gilbert kids aren't sane! That has to be the only explanation for their being so willing to continue immersing themselves in the supernatural world. And I'm just as crazy for caring whether they live or die. I'm a vampire. Humans are my natural prey. But now I find myself __protecting__ these humans and hating myself if I bring harm to them._

_I haven't felt this close to being human since the day I woke up in transition. And the one responsible for this is Elena. Part of me wants to thank her for this. And part of me, my vampire side, wants to mark her as __mine__. My mate. My eternal love. __Mine__. And that's just ridiculous because she refuses to give me her heart, though I can see in her eyes the desperate desire to give herself to me completely. She's not fooling me._

"_I love Stefan." Yeah, okay, I get that, Elena. But I didn't hear you say "I'm __in__ love with Stefan." There's a difference between loving someone and being __in love__ with them. The big question she needs to answer for herself is which one she feels for my brother. _

Elena stops for a moment, realizing Damon's right. _Is_ she in love with Stefan? She wants to say yes, but she's not so sure. Damon's words about only being able to love someone by accepting every part of them as a real piece of them are eating at her. And Stefan doesn't accept any side of her that he hasn't personally brought to the surface as real. And dammit all, that hurts! How can someone be so damn selfish?

Before her thoughts run away with her, she turns to the next entry, which was made just this morning.

_I've decided that I need to get out of town for a while, just go on a drive. I plan on being back this afternoon but first I'm going to write in this journal for a bit. It's barely dawn. As a vampire, my instincts are telling me to get into a dark place, away from any hint of daylight. If it weren't for this ring on my hand, I'd be doing just that instead of sitting in my room with the curtains wide open and the rising sun shining in. Vampires and sunlight is an unnatural mix, well more unnatural that the mere existence of vampires to begin with._

_I digress. The reason I chose to write at this time is, as always, Elena. That girl is constantly in my thoughts and, hell, I even __dream__ of her. Surprisingly, the dreams aren't always ones where I show her my extensive skill as I make love to her over and over. I only slept for a few hours last night, but the dream has been haunting me since I woke up three hours ago._

_It was one of those different dreams, the ones where I'm not making wild love to her. This one felt so real I still feel every sensation as I think about it. We were at The Grill. I was getting drinks for the two of us while she waited for me at one of the pool tables._

_She smiled brightly at me as I brought the drinks back. Then I kissed her, a chaste kiss on the lips, as I handed her one of the drinks. She took a sip of hers before setting it down on the pool table. "Who's breaking?" she asked, playing with the cue stick._

_I told her that I wanted to show her something different, setting my drink down. And then I went around to show her the couples' position of playing pool as one rather than two. She laughed and I kissed her cheek._

_It had all felt so damn real and, God, I __want__ it. I want it so damn bad; to be with her and neither of us afraid to show our feelings for each other in public. As much as I hate quoting Disney movies, I'd show her a whole new world if she were mine. But she's not. Anyways, Stefan left last night to go hunting for the weekend. If I'm going to get that drive in before trouble has a chance to pop up, I best leave now._

Elena closes the journal, frowning thoughtfully. She sets it back on the nightstand but doesn't make a move to get off of Damon's bed. She looks over at his sleeping form and she is now certain that he has fallen asleep. He wouldn't allow himself to look so damn innocent if he was awake, not even if he was pretending to sleep. Elena scoots down to lay her head on his pillow.

She'd had a rough night last night, tossing and turning as her conversation with her brother replayed itself over and over. Maybe she could close her eyes, just for a little while. Just a short rest, really. She still wants to talk to him, after all, and she's not going to wake him up for it. 'Just a short nap,' she tells herself, closing her eyes and curling up on her side against him. She quickly falls fast asleep, curled trustingly against Damon.

* * *

Sarah: so, was my version of Damon's inner thoughts up to snuff, my lovely readers? Drop me a review and let me know what you think. I do so hope you enjoyed. I'll get to work on chapter 2 now.


	2. Progress

Snooping Isn't Polite  
DG32173

Sarah: here's chapter two. I hope you enjoy. Also, I'm pretending that Edgar Allan Poe was one of Damon's many pen names. I don't own Edgar Allan Poe or any of his works. And yes, I know Edgar Allan Poe lived and died before Damon even became a vampire. But this _is_ an ALTERNATE UNIVERSE! Either deal or go away. The Poe thing is necessary for plot. If you can't handle pretending that in the universe this fic takes place in Edgar Allen Poe is born _after_ Damon becomes a vampire, then leave now. If you don't mind me rewriting history for the sake of the plot, read on.

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Chapter 2  
Progress

Some time in the evening, Damon wakes up, going from sleeping to wide awake without the in-between stages of various levels of grogginess most people suffer from. It dates back to his human days as a soldier in the civil war and after he became a vampire, he made sure to never lose that combat readiness. As soon as he opens his eyes and sees the sleeping body next to him, he immediately thinks Katherine had come to play more mind games with him. But then he sees the human and humane traits that distinctly separate Katherine from Elena and relaxes.

That's when he remembers coming back from the long drive he had taken to clear his mind only to find Elena's car in the driveway. He knew that she knew damn well that his brother was spending the weekend hunting, so he was curious about her motives for coming over. He realized with regret the only reason she'd seek his company and decided to get it over with. He had thought she'd be waiting for him in the foyer but was surprised to track her unique scent to _his_ room. And, lo and behold, there she was, reading _his_ journal. He could tell instantly that she had already read the most important parts so he decided that he might as well let her finish delving into his private thoughts. But he couldn't resist scaring her by letting her know he's there.

He had intended to stay awake when he lay down next to her, let her purge whatever was in her pretty head, then shoo her on her way so he could try yet again to drink away his problems, though not to the extent that had led to the unfortunate snapping of her brother's neck. But apparently he was more tired than he realized and, like always, her mere presence made him relax, thus making sleep inevitable.

He slowly props himself up to look down at the girl sleeping in his bed. On the many occasions he had fantasized having Elena sleeping in his bed, not once did those fantasies involve either of them wearing clothes. 'But it's still progress,' he thinks. He reaches over her sleeping body to grab his journal off the nightstand and the fountain pen laying next to it, careful not to wake her. He props himself up with his pillows – except for the one Elena's sleeping on – and makes himself comfortable before he begins to add onto the last entry.

_Well, what do you know? I get back from the drive, come home, and find Elena in my bed waiting for me. Admittedly, she was wearing clothes and reading this journal. But she's no longer avoiding me like the plague, so it's progress. I am actually embarrassed to admit that I fell asleep while letting her finish reading this journal, considering she had already read so much. When I woke up, I discovered that she had fallen asleep as well, curled against me. Definitely progress. Does this mean that she is at least considering forgiving me for snapping her brother's neck? God, I hope so. This whole avoidance thing is getting annoying. Not to mention depressing._

_Well, I've always been completely honest with her, almost brutally honest. Besides, she knows me better than anyone in this world. Even my own brother doesn't know me half as well as she does. Not to mention that I dig out her journal when she's away from her room and read it to learn more about her. I sometimes leave her a little note, which she gets royally pissed about. So I decided it was fair for her to get a peak at my thoughts. I invade her privacy often enough. But since she's shown this sudden penchant for snooping, I better burn the journal I had when I was human. Don't know why I haven't done so before now, considering it contains memories best left forgotten._

_What's in those pages are not for anyone to read. If I could burn the memories from my brain, I'd do so in an instant. But this is all besides the point. Coming home to find Elena in my bed, even if she was clothed and reading my journal, was like a dream come true. But she's not mine. Not yet anyways. When she decides to finally face facts and embrace her true self again, I'll be right there waiting with open arms. Her true self is too full of fire for Stefan to even hope to hold onto._

_God, I hope this is progress we're making here and I'm not going to get the cold shoulder again. I'd rather she ram a stake through my heart than go through all that again. But now she understands why I snapped like that. Maybe we can move on from this with a little better understanding of one another. I hope that we can at least salvage our friendship. She's pretty much my only friend. Her friends don't like me, no matter that I'm the one who's actually protecting them and not Stefan, whom they seem to adore. Does it matter that his diet makes him too weak to be effective protection? No. That leaves me to do the hard work and him to get the adoration. It's been this way since the day Mother died giving birth to him._

_Sometimes I get so damned jealous of Stefan that I literally see red. If I didn't have such a strong will, I'd have killed him long ago, no problem. But I can't do that. He's my little brother and I can't just kill him, no matter __how__ irritating he gets._

Damon pauses in his writing, glancing down at Elena as she snuggles closer to him. "Damon," she breathes in her sleep. Damon's lips curl into a soft smile as he gazes at her with more tenderness than he would ever allow anyone to see. Then he returns to his journal.

_Elena even dreams of me, and I don't have to place those dreams there. How can she __not__ see we're so perfect for each other? I've said it before and I'll go on saying it: Elena is my humanity. And I bring out her inner fire. Why is she fighting so hard against the perfection we could be together? When I first saw her, I wanted to make her my Queen of Darkness. Now I just want to make her my queen. She's too human to allow darkness to overtake her and to humane to let me dwell in the shadows. I want her for who she is, for the humanity she brings out in me, for the overwhelming love I feel for her._

_When a human becomes a vampire, __everything__ is enhanced to the extreme, that is a fact. Every aspect of their personality, every emotion they feel, every one of the five senses. Vampirism makes you the perfected form of who you are and who you could be. You can no longer deny the parts of you that you don't want anyone to find out about. That's why Stefan doesn't want Elena to become a vampire. He's terrified that when she's been perfected in death, she won't be the girl he watched over the summer and fell in love with over the school year. I wish I could make him see how illogical that is. If he truly loves her, he should want to be with her forever. If he's scared that he won't love her perfected form, then he doesn't love her now, not truly._

_Vampirism doesn't change who you are. It just makes you an extreme version of who you are. I consider vampires to be the perfected form of the humans they once were and could have become. Sure, we have this nifty switch to flip our emotions on and off, but that doesn't mean the switch doesn't get flipped back on when we want it off. Hell, look at me! I had my switch firmly in the "off" position but Elena busted her ass flipping it right back on __twice__ and the second time she broke it so that it was __stuck__ in the "on" position. Not very kind of her if she wasn't going to let herself face my humanity._

_Now I'm stuck on the vampire version of an emotional rollercoaster with no way to get off the damn thing. But, hey, I was __asking__ for this when I didn't make tracks right after finding out Katherine wasn't in the tomb. Elena draws me in, makes me __want__ to be the good guy, and then turns her head away when I __do__ bring my good side out. But she gets mad as hell when my bad side shows up in retaliation. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. That's the way it is. That's the way it's been since the day Stefan was born and it doesn't look like the Fates are going to deal me a new hand of cards anytime soon. So, for now, I'm screwed. But if the Fates don't start giving me a better hand soon, I'll damn well swipe the deck and pick out the cards for a Royal Flush in hearts. I won't settle for this lot in life much longer. And look at me, talking like this is all a poker game. In a way, it __is__ a poker game. The stakes being who gets the girl in the end. And I'll be damned if I lose. Literally __and __figuratively._

Damon lifts the pen away from the page and shuts the journal. He gently leans over to put the pen and journal back on the nightstand. He checks the clock, noting that it's just after nine pm. He decides it's time to wake Elena before he gets too tempted to let her spend the night in his bed. He knows giving in to that temptation will not be a smart move at this point in trying to earn her friendship back. He gently shakes Elena's shoulder.

"Elena, time to wake up," he says. She grumbles in her sleep and buries her face his side. He chuckles. "C'mon, wake up, Sleeping Beauty. As big as the temptation to let you spend the night here is, I know damn well that you'll be pissed as hell that I let you spend it in my bed. Now get up."

"G' 'way," she grumbles, swatting her hand in his general direction.

"Ah, ah, ah. This is _my_ bed, Miss Gilbert. I'm not going to vacate it just so you can continue to sleep," he tells her, catching her hand. "You know, St. Stefan will get all the wrong thoughts about what's going on if he showed up right now." Nothing. Damon raises an eyebrow at the lack of response that taunt had drawn, when he was so sure that it would wake her up. "You know, I didn't want to do this," he says, maneuvering himself into prime tickling position. "Okay, maybe I did. But, still, you asked for it."

He proceeds to lightly trail his fingers down Elena's ribcage through her shirt. He knows her every tickling spot and what needs to be done at each for most effect. Elena squirms, squeezing her eyes shut. "Stop," she groans sleepily.

"Are you going to wake up and tell me what brought you here today?" he asks, pausing.

"Not now," she mutters.

"Not good enough," Damon says decisively, trailing his fingers lightly up and down Elena's ribcage.

Elena continues to squirm, trying to get away from the tickling. When Damon's hands leave her sides, she thinks maybe he gave up. But when he slides her shoes off, she remembers that this is _Damon._ Damon doesn't give up, ever. Then the tickling begins in earnest. Elena is trying to catch her breath around her laughter. "Okay! I give! I'm awake!" she cries out amid chuckles.

Damon promptly reclines on the bed next to her with a Cheshire grin. "Are you going to tell me what you came over for or am I going to have to tickle it out of you?" he asks.

"I came to get answers," Elena gasps, her sides heaving as she tries to catch her breath.

"Oh?" Damon asks, raising an eyebrow.

Elena swats him in annoyance. "Your journal gave me the answers I wanted but now I have _more_ questions," she says breathlessly.

"By all means, ask away," Damon says, motioning for her to continue. "You got a look inside my head and want to know more. I assure you, not everyone is lucky enough to find me so accommodating," he says with just enough acid to remind her that she's dealing with a _vampire_ when she is around Damon, not just the human he resembles. With Damon, it was always best to remember that he actually accepts his vampire side much more easily than he accepts his humanity.

Elena sighs, raking a hand through her hair. "I'm sorry, Damon. Reading your journal like that was wrong of me," she says sincerely.

Damon nods. "Since it's _you,"_ he says finally, his tone considerably lighter, "I'll answer any question you have. Just don't go telling _anyone."_

"Damon, you know you can trust me," Elena says earnestly. Damon raises an eyebrow. She sighs, remembering all that's gone on between them these past few weeks. Of course he won't just _trust_ her after all that. She's not sure why she still trusts him as much as she does. "I won't tell anyone what you confide in me," she vows.

Damon relaxes marginally. "So, you come here for questions, read my journal and got your answers, but also got more questions," he says. "Ask away."

"Were you really going to kill yourself if Jeremy hadn't been wearing the ring?" she asks softly.

Damon's silent for a while, thinking about how best to answer that. "I've always given you the truth, Elena," he says finally. "If Jeremy hadn't been wearing the ring, I'd probably have found the highest point in town and taken my ring off right there as the sun rose. I was that torn up about losing control like that."

Elena closes her eyes and takes a shaky breath. "I'm glad Jeremy was wearing his ring for more reasons than one now," she whispers.

"I knew you'd be torn up if I died. You've done your damnedest to keep me alive, even when you didn't even _like_ me. You risked your life to save mine. But I also knew that if Jeremy hadn't been wearing that ring, you would never have been able to forgive me. And not being able to at least be your friend is the one thing that's scarier than death." Damon watches Elena silently for a moment. "On that note, I have a question for you," he says.

Elena frowns. "I thought I was the one asking questions," she says in confusion.

"I only let you continue reading that journal because I've read yours so many times. I'm not going to let you continue delving into my mind unless I get to do a little digging into yours," he retorts.

Elena searches his eyes and finds that he's completely serious about this. "Fair's fair," she sighs. "What's your question?"

"Had Jeremy not been wearing that ring and I subsequently met sunrise without _my_ ring, whose death would have hurt more?" he asks. He watches Elena's eyes widen, begging him not to press the subject. "I've been completely honest with you, Elena. More so than I've been with anyone in my life. I think I deserve a little honesty in return," he says firmly, not backing down.

Elena sighs and closes her eyes. "Jeremy's my little brother. Watching him die like that was like losing my parents all over again and then some," she says, then hesitates.

"I'm sensing a 'but'," Damon prods.

Elena grits her teeth because Damon won't let well enough alone. She realizes yet again that he has never lied to her before. He may have withheld information from her but he never flat-out lied to her face. It's about time she give him the same in return. "But I would have recovered from his death, eventually," she concedes.

"And if I died?" Damon presses, determined to get her to admit that she feels _something_ for him, even if she doesn't come right out and confess undying love.

"If you died, I wouldn't _want_ to recover from it," she fesses up. "Not that I ever would."

"What does that mean?" Damon asks.

"I answered your question, Damon," she says. "My turn. Where did you go today?"

"I'm pretty sure that you finished reading what I had wrote this morning," he points out. She narrows her eyes at him. "I literally just went for a drive, Elena. That was it. I drove until the Camaro was nearly out of gas. Then I filled up and came back. I needed to get away, as much so as I could given the tendency you have for finding trouble without even trying. I had a lot of thoughts I needed to sort through and I happen to do that best when driving." He takes a moment to think about his next question. "Why were you snooping in my journal? Given the way you get so pissed when you find my messages in yours, I'd have thought you held yourself above that."

Elena blushes. "I was overcome with curiosity about what you would have written in it. And I decided that since you read mine on a regular basis, it was only fair that I take a peek," she admits. "But then I just couldn't stop."

Damon rolls his eyes. "You should see some of Stefan's journals. He could publish them as actual novels. Of course, they'd be in the adult graphic horror genre, but still."

"Like yours are any better," Elena shoots back.

Damon reaches over Elena's body, his chest pressing against hers a little longer than she felt comfortable. He picks up the journal from the nightstand. "Elena, this is the first journal I've kept since I was human," he tells her seriously. "I haven't felt the need to keep one until the night you put your trust in me by taking off your necklace and saying I could compel the truth from you. Stefan's the journal keeper. Me? I did some writing over the years, but nothing _this_ personal."

"You write?" Elena asks, surprised.

"I'm counting that as a question," he says and she smacks him. "Ow! Seriously, what part of 'enhanced senses' do you not understand?" he says, rubbing his arm. "Anyways, to answer your question, I've got a few works published under various pen names." He raises an eyebrow. "Edgar Allen Poe is one of my more famous guises."

"You're Poe?" Elena asks, unable to stop the pleased grin from spreading across her face.

"And Stefan never fails to remind me of it every damn time he sees a raven. That's one of my few poems that he actually _likes._ He's the one who insisted I publish it," Damon admits. "He's got one of the books of poetry I published under Poe stashed somewhere in his room, that damned poem tagged."

"So Lenore was Katherine?" Elena asks softly.

"Actually, no," Damon confesses. "Lenore was the girl I envisioned myself spending eternity with. She wasn't real, but she held all the qualities I wanted in a soulmate." Damon's quiet for several moments and Elena realizes that he's about to make her uncomfortable. "You, Elena, hold every damn quality I imagined in Lenore and many that I couldn't even dream of ever finding in someone walking this planet." He meets her eyes. "You just asked _three_ questions, Elena. So I get three questions." Elena sighs. "What made you decide to end the silent treatment you were giving me long enough to come confront me with the questions you had?" he asks.

"Jeremy," Elena sighs. Damon raises an eyebrow and she scowls at him for not giving her a second question. "Jeremy confronted me this morning about holding a grudge against you for snapping his neck. He said that if _he_ could forgive you for killing him, then I couldn't reasonably hold a grudge against you. He pointed out that it was _his_ neck that was snapped, not mine. It was _his_ life that could have been ended that night, not mine. I told him every reason I had and he used logic to cut them to ribbons. Eventually, he convinced me to at least confront you about what happened that night. He pointed out that something had to have driven you to such extremes. He pointed out the only thing that could get to you so badly that would cause you to get drunk and come to me was if Katherine had done something. He said that he had been sorely tempted to stake you for killing him but the realization that Katherine was behind your actions changed his mind. That's when I gave up. He was making too much sense and I couldn't think of anything to refute it."

Damon looks away when Elena tries to search his eyes. "So, now that you know who was behind the situation and what had caused things to get so out-of-control, what are you going to do about it?" Damon asks.

"Well there's what I _want_ to do and what I'm stuck doing," she admits. "What I _want_ to do is track her down and make her pay for every lick of pain she put you through. But I know that's not feasible. I'm human, she's a centuries old vampire that could kill me as soon as look at me. So what I'm stuck doing is mopping up her mess and busting my ass to make sure you don't lose control like that again."

"I notice that you didn't stick Stefan in there when you said you _wanted_ to make her pay for the pain she put me through," Damon replies.

"That's not a question," Elena growls.

"Just stating a fact, Elena," he retorts with a grin.

"You still have to ask your third question," Elena gripes.

"Working on figuring out what I want to ask," Damon replies. Elena's stomach growls and Damon's smirk grows. "C'mon, I'll cook you something," he says, hopping the bed.

"You have food here?" Elena asks, startled. She gets off the bed and follows him out of the room.

"Ah, ah, ah. That's a question," Damon teases as they make their way downstairs.

"Damon!" Elena snaps.

"Elena," he replies with a grin as he leads her into the kitchen. "Have a seat at the island," he says, heading for the fridge. He opens the doors and contemplates his options before settling on a Mexican-style stir-fry. He grabs his ingredients and closes the fridge door. He sets them out on the counter before picking out a frying pan from the selection hanging over the stove. "I decided to make my next question simple: what do you want with your stir-fry?" he asks. He pulls a long knife out of the knife block and begins slicing the vegetables.

"Stir-fry? I thought you were Italian!" Elena exclaims.

"I am. But it gets a little boring cooking just Italian dishes when I'm in the mood to cook," he replies. "I figured if my eternal hobby is going to be cooking, then I might as well learn all the styles and recipes I could get my hands on. Now, answer the question, Elena."

"Surprise me," Elena challenges.

"Oh-ho, be prepared to be surprised, Miss Gilbert," he says, giving her a cocky grin. Elena watches in fascination as Damon proceeds to cook her a fabulous dinner. Damon makes a Greek salad to go along with the stir-fry. "Desert will be a surprise," he says, winking at her. "But I know you'll love it."

"Greece and Mexico in one meal? I'm already surprised," Elena admits.

"When it works well together, there's no harm having dishes from different backgrounds in one meal," Damon says, placing the salad on the counter. He then returns to the stir-fry, which is simmering. He carefully tosses it a few more times before pouring it onto a waiting plate. He turns the stove off and carries the plate to the counter. He sets the stir-fry next to the salad then fetches a couple of plates, a couple of forks, and a couple of glasses. He sets a place for each of them.

He grabs a pitcher of sweet tea from the fridge and fills Elena's glass with it. He returns the pitcher to the fridge and grabs a blood bag, tossing it in the microwave. Once it's warmed up, he rips the valve off and pours the blood in his glass. He disposes of the empty bag and then proceeds to dish out a serving of salad and stir-fry for each of them. Finally he takes his seat. "Bon appetite," he says, smirking at Elena.

Elena watches as he takes a sip of his blood before she turns to her food. She finds it strange that she's not at all disgusted at sharing a meal with him while he's drinking blood from his glass as opposed to the sweet tea he gave her. She scoops up a mouthful of stir-fry and moans in delight at the taste, all thoughts about eating a meal with a vampire replaced by the sheer joy at the flavors in her mouth. "This is really good," Elena says after she's swallowed her mouthful. She takes a sip of her tea.

"Glad to know my skills in the kitchen have pleased you," he says, ice blue eyes twinkling with merriment.

"A writer and a cook. Consider me impressed, Damon," Elena chuckles.

Suddenly, a buzz comes from Damon's back pocket, signaling he just got a text. Damon sighs but digs out his phone. He glances at the screen and frowns. He sets his fork down and replies to the text. After a few more back and forth texts, Damon puts his phone back in his pocket. "You're going to get a call from your boyfriend right about… now," he says.

Right on cue, Elena's phone lets out the ringtone she set for Stefan. She pulls her phone out of her pocket, raising a questioning eyebrow at Damon. He just motions for her to answer it before taking a sip of his blood. Elena frowns and answers the phone. "Stefan? Is everything okay?" she asks.

"_Elena, I'm so sorry about this, but something came up with a business I have in England that I need to take care of personally,"_ Stefan says apologetically.

"You have a company in England?" Elena asks, surprised.

"_Yes,"_ Stefan says without elaborating. _"Anyways, as much as I hate to, I've asked Damon to keep an eye on things while I'm gone. I'm already on my way to the airport. I'll call when I can and I'll be back as soon as possible. I love you."_

"I love you, too," Elena says softly, though it's become more of an automatic response than one with any actual feeling. But the dial tone was already sounding before she got even the first syllable out. She sighs and hangs up. "You were texting Stefan?" she asks Damon, putting her phone back in her pocket.

"He texted me, told me in explicit detail what he would do to me if I let anything happen to you or this town while he was gone, told me what's up in England, and then said he's going to call and tell you himself," Damon says, sipping at his blood.

"I didn't know he had a business in England," Elena says, frowning.

"Every vampire winds up owning at least one big name corporation in this world by the end of their third decade. I have several," Damon says with a shrug. "It's how we expand our wealth. Even for vampires, money is a powerful bargaining chip. There are just some situations where you can't use compulsion for something. That's where money comes in. Stefan has a printing company in England and another one here in America. He published a number of my books and poems. The company in England has an annoying tendency to run into problems if he doesn't put in an appearance at least once a year. It's been three years since he was last over there, so it was a little overdue."

"You keep track of his whereabouts?" Elena asks before taking a bite of her salad.

"He's my little brother. As much as he makes me want to kill him at times, I still need to look out for him. I keep tabs on his exact whereabouts so that if trouble stirs up in his location, I can get there in time to bail his ass out of it," he says. "He knows damn well that if he doesn't check in with me before disappearing from a location, I'll hunt his ass down and beat him up for making me worry. That's why he checked in with me first before letting you know that he's going to be gone a lot longer than this weekend. He knows that if he had checked in with you first, I wouldn't have been very happy when he got back." Elena nods in understanding. They eat in silence for a bit. "So, I'm going to make those two questions you asked freebies since they were about my brother. Which means it's still your turn to ask a question," Damon says as they finish up their meal. He busies himself with finding containers for the leftovers and transferring them over.

"Actually, one of them involved you as well," Elena corrects. "So it's your turn again."

Damon smirks. "I was wondering if you were going to point that out," he admits, putting the leftovers in the fridge and pulling out a bowl with a dish that Elena does not recognize. Damon catches her curious look and rolls his eyes. "Something tells me you've never had tiramisu before," he chuckles, carrying the dish over to the counter.

Elena frowns. "Isn't that a lovers' dish?" she asks as he gently sets the bowl down. He quickly grabs two bowls and two spoons for them, setting one of each in front of Elena and the others in front of his own seat. Then he vamps around, putting the rest of the dishes in the sink to wash later.

"That's a question. But I'll answer it. Tiramisu _can_ be a lovers' dish, yes. But it's also a classic Italian desert. _This_ is my mother's special recipe. I'm the only one walking this Earth who knows it now. You better be damned grateful that I'm willing to share it with you. Last time Stefan tried to steal a taste, I broke his wrist. My mother taught me how to make it while she was pregnant with Stefan. I was the last one to share this dish with her before she died giving birth to my brother. I've never let anyone else have a taste of it until now, not even Stefan," Damon says. He serves each of them a generous helping before returning the bowl to the fridge. Elena pokes the confection in her bowl, wondering about the red streaks going through it. "Relax, Elena. I didn't put blood in it. Mother would never forgive me for such disgraceful manners. If you're wondering about the red, it's homemade strawberry syrup. Mother's favorite food was strawberries and she added the flavor wherever she could when cooking. She's the one who gave me a passion for cooking that lasts to this day. Her secret dream was to be a world famous chef, but that particular career path was reserved strictly for men in those days for all that cooking was women's work in the home. She made do with what she could get away with. And Father let her get away with a whole lot more than most men let their wives get away with in those days. He was never the same after she died."

Elena scoops up a spoonful of tiramisu and puts it on her mouth. Her eyes widen in wonder at the richness of dish. "This is really good," she compliments once she clears her mouth. Then she eats a second spoonful.

"My mother would be ecstatic to know she has another fan of one of her recipes." Damon says, his thoughts elsewhere as he eats his bowl of tiramisu. It's only when they're cleaning up the dishes together that Damon pulls himself back together. "Anyways, I get two questions since I let you get away with a second one," he reminds Elena. He takes the dish she's passing him and rinses it before putting it in the dish rack "My first question is what is with that teddy of yours? Don't get me wrong, I think it's cute, but I've been meaning to ask about it."

"My Mother took me to a Build-A-Bear Workshop shortly after I turned five," Elena says, continuing to wash the dirty dishes and pass the cleaned ones to Damon. "She told me that a teddy bear is a little girl's guardian angel and it was about time I got one for myself, considering all the mischief I got into even then. I saw all these kids making these really elaborate teddy bears and it frightened me. I wanted mine to be simple and huggable. I knew that the first teddy bear I ever got had to be special, too. As I carefully picked out the fur, the stuffing, and everything that goes into making a teddy bear, Mom explained further about the story of the teddy bear. She told me that while the teddy bear was the little girl's guardian angel, he also stood watch over her through the years and caught her tears when she was sad. He was her best friend, knowing everything that ever happened to the girl, even what she didn't want to put in her journal." She smiles slightly as she passes the last dish, a cup, to Damon. "Mom also said that when the right man walks into the girl's life, the teddy bear wouldn't let the girl let him walk away again. When the lady who put my teddy bear together asked me what I would call him, I decided to simply call him Teddy. The lady stitched Teddy's name in fine print just inside his left ear and my name just inside his right. She said that way if Teddy ever got lost, he would find his way back to me again."

"Fascinating," Damon says, carefully rinsing the cup before stacking it next to the rest of the clean dishes.

"Stefan doesn't like Teddy," Elena admits sadly. "And I don't think Teddy likes him very much either."

"Well, _I_ like Teddy," Damon says candidly. "I wouldn't hold onto him when I'm in your room if I didn't."

Elena hides a smile. "I think Teddy much prefers you over anyone else I know," she says, her eyes twinkling. "You don't ignore him like everyone else who enters my room."

They make their way back upstairs to his room, neither of them even thinking of continuing their conversation in the foyer. "You should check in with Jenna," he remarks as he sets to building a roaring fire in his fireplace while she sits on his bed, watching him.

"I'll call Jeremy. He'd be able to keep her calm over the fact that I'm spending unsupervised time in your company," Elena says, pulling out her cell phone. "She's still not letting go of the porch scene she _still_ thinks I was a part of."

Damon rolls his eyes as he grabs the matchbox off the mantle. "I could easily make it so that she doesn't remember that scene ever happened," he remarks, pulling out a match. "Wish someone could do the same for me." He lights the match and tosses it onto the carefully arranged firewood. He makes sure the fire takes to the logs before making his way over to sit next to her.

"As tempting as that offer is, I'd rather not have any more compulsions placed on my family," Elena sighs, searching through her list of contacts for her brother's name. Upon finding it, she hits send and puts the phone to her ear.

It takes two rings for Jeremy to answer. _"Hey, Lena. Did you take my advice?"_ he greets.

"I did. Listen, I'm at the boarding house hanging out with Damon. Considering the time, I'm probably going to spend the night," she says.

"And where will you be spending the night?" Damon teases.

Elena smacks him before going back to her conversation with her brother. "So could you tell Jenna as gently as possible that my friendship with Damon is on the mend and I'm going to be hanging out with him tonight and won't be back until sometime tomorrow?" she asks.

"_You're actually in luck, because Jenna is going to be spending the night at Rick's,"_ Jeremy says smugly. _"She said she _might_ be up to leaving us home alone for the whole weekend but we better not screw this up or she will never let us out of her sight again except for school."_

Elena smiles. "Well, then, I just have to make it home before she does and she won't know the difference," she says. "Okay, thanks for filling me in, Jer."

"_Tell Damon I said hey."_

With that, the dial tone lets Elena know that her brother had hung up. "Well, when did you get an invitation to spend the night?" Damon asks, scooting up in the bed to prop himself up against the headboard with his arms behind his head.

"I don't hear anyone saying I _can't_ stay the night," Elena retorts, repositioning herself so that she's laying on her stomach next to him with her head propped in her hands. "And you just asked _two_ questions when you only had one more. So I get two."

"Dammit," Damon curses.

Elena chuckles. "My first question is what all genres did you write?" Elena asks.

Damon rolls his eyes. "Mostly adult books of various genres. Nothing for the faint of heart, I assure you," he says. "Though I did write a few adult romances." Elena chokes back a laugh. He glares at her. "Just a few. They were more along the lines of dark romance with a more sinister plotline than the average romantic would enjoy."

Elena just shakes her head at the thought of Damon Salvatore writing _any_ form of romance novel. "My second question is more of a request," Elena says when she gets herself together.

"Okay, then, make your request," Damon says.

"I want you to tell me about Poe. I want to know how you came up with him and that style of writing," Elena says.

"Poe, huh? You better get a little more comfortable for this one," Damon replies.

Elena sighs but maneuvers so that she's laying on her side facing him, her head propped in her hand. "Okay, you can begin," she says.

* * *

Sarah: and the explanation of Damon and Poe will take place next chapter. I hope you enjoyed. Please review and tell me if I kept Damon true to form. I'll get to work on the third chapter now.


	3. Being Poe

Snooping Isn't Polite  
DG32173

Sarah: and here's chapter three of _Snooping Isn't Polite._ In this chapter, Damon will explain the intricacies of being the brains behind Edgar Allan Poe. I hope you enjoy.

_**NOTE**_  
As you should have read the beginning author note last chapter, I don't want to hear complaints about Poe having died in 1849. This is an alternate universe. There is a reason for Poe being an alias of Damon's which is it's critical for future plotline. In this universe, Poe didn't make an appearance in the literary field until the 1890s. If you can't handle that, then go away.

* * *

Chapter 3  
Being Poe

"Well, to begin with, Edgar Allan Poe _was_ a real man, albeit human," Damon starts. "He was struggling with picking up a writing career. The first book of poems, _Tamerlane and Other Poems, _ where all his. They were pretty well accepted among the public, but he wanted a whole new feel for his writing. He kept applying Stefan's American-based publishing company with his attempts. Stefan got in contact with me cause he wanted me to take a look. I dropped by and examined the work. The works were good, yes. But they just felt incomplete and even Stefan couldn't publish something that felt incomplete. I had a good bit of muse at the time and I could see parts in Poe's works that I could enhance and 'complete'. So I tracked the guy down and struck up a deal with him: I help him achieve that 'complete' feeling in his works and he let me use his name to publish my own works, which were of a similar style."

"You could have compelled him," Elena points out.

"I could have, but I had tried that before and the works were disasters," Damon says with a grimace. "I didn't even bother showing them to Stefan, throwing the attempts into the fire instead. Unfortunately, the kind of deals I had to make to get my work published using other people's names wasn't the kind of thing you could just compel into place. I was using my partner in the deal as a bouncing board for my own ideas as well as helping with their ideas. The creativity it takes to write poetry, short stories, and novels and have them be a success just disappears when the human is under compulsion. No, compulsion just won't work in this case. Anyways, I was the macabre and he was the mystery in the works we published together. But _The Raven_ belongs to _me,_ Elena. Virginia didn't like me in the least but she tolerated me for Edgar's sake. His best known works, the gothic ones, were actually mine. He didn't like writing such 'unnatural' tales and poetry. I told him that my works were actually in popular taste at the time and the publication of my works would bring more attention to his own pieces. Each time he found out I had published such a work under his name, the debate would be repeated again and again. The only compulsion I put on Edgar and Virginia was to keep my existence a secret."

"_The Cask of Amontillado_ was yours, I'm guessing," Elena says.

"Actually, Edgar and I worked on it together. He was in a vengeful mood at the time. Believe me, you don't want to know what got him to be that angry. _The Masque of the Red Death_ was mine, though. _A Descent into the Maelstrom._ _The Tell-Tale Heart, The Pit and the Pendulum, _and _The Premature Burial_ were mine as well. Pretty much all the horrors had my touch in them if they weren't purely mine," Damon says. "My personal favorite of the ones I authored under Poe was _The Oval Portrait."_

Elena thinks about all he's told her about Poe. "You have a morbid fascination with death, even for someone who's part of the undead," Elena remarks finally.

Damon shrugs. "Being able to bring death so easily to others and having actually _experienced_ it myself, it's not all that much of a surprise that I'd find it an interesting concept to analyze," Damon replies. "I don't think about it that much these days. I've had other things occupying my mind," he continues, raising an eyebrow at her to let her know _exactly_ what, or rather _who,_ has been occupying his mind.

Elena feels her cheeks heat up. "Anyways, it's your turn to ask a question," she says, trying to change subject.

Damon smirks. "My question this time is actually rather simple: where are you going to sleep tonight?" he asks curiously.

Elena scowls. "I …" she starts.

"Remember, Elena, we agreed to be completely honest with our answers," he reminds her.

Elena sighs. "If I can get your promise not to try anything, I'll _consider_ sleeping on your bed," she says. "Stefan's bed would be too lonely and I'm not going to drive all the way back home to just climb into my own bed."

"Elena, I promise not to do anything to you that you don't want me to," he says, his eyes twinkling merrily.

Elena groans, knowing that's the only thing he will promise and knowing damn well that he knows just as well as she does that what her heart wants is a very different thing from what her mind wants. Damon reaches across her to turn of the lamp on the nightstand, leaving the room lit only by the flames dancing in the fireplace.

"Well, make yourself comfortable," Damon says, climbing off the bed. "I'm going to get a shower before bed."

Elena sighs as Damon grabs a pair of boxer briefs from his dresser and heads into his en-suite bathroom, shutting the doors behind him. She slides off the bed as she hears him turn the water on. She sheds her shirt, jeans, and socks and places them next to where Damon had tossed her shoes so he could tickle her feet earlier. Then she climbs under the covers in just her sports bra and boy-shorts underwear. She wiggles until she's found a comfortable position and rests her head on one of his pillows.

When Damon comes out of the bathroom fifteen minutes later, dressed only in black silk boxer-briefs, he notes that Elena is fast asleep in his bed, this time under the covers. He wonders if he's having some sort of continuous miracle going on today. First Elena finally stopped giving him the silent treatment and actually sought him out today. Admittedly, he had been out but the fact that she waited for him _in his room_ was an even bigger bonus. Then he woke up next to her on his bed and found that she had fallen asleep curled trustingly against him. Not only that, they played a game of twenty questions with the only rule being complete honesty and he got her to laugh. Not to mention that he was finally able to cook dinner for just the two of them. Sharing his mother's tiramisu with her had been a huge risk because of it's renown as a couples' desert, but she loved it. _Stefan_ contacted them during dinner to tell them he would be gone a lot longer than just this weekend and Elena didn't seem to torn up about it. And now she's back in his bed, fast asleep.

He lifts the covers just enough to confirm that she had indeed stripped to just her underclothes. Dear God, she trusts him to restrain himself against _that_ temptation! The fact that he just wants to lay down in the bed next to her and go back to sleep in her comforting presence is a sure sign of what this human does to him. The Damon who showed up in this town last May would have had a ball with what most men would take as an open invitation. But now he only wants to familiarize himself with the comfort her presence gives him once more.

But first he walks over to bank the fire properly. It would be just his luck to finally have the girl in his bed for the night only for a stray spark from the flames light the whole damn boarding house on fire. Better to not risk it. When his father taught him and Stefan the proper safety etiquette when it came to using the fireplaces in their old manor, he had made sure to drill in their heads that leaving a fire burning overnight is _asking_ for trouble. Just because Damon is nearly a hundred-and-seventy years old and hasn't faced that danger yet doesn't mean he should get reckless. Particularly not when Elena's life would also be in danger. No, it's best to safely bank the fire for the night before going to bed.

Once the fire is taken care of, Damon moves over to the side of the bed Elena had left him. He _prefers_ sleeping next to the nightstand since he keeps a stake stashed in the drawer in case of emergencies. But Elena took over that side of the bed and he's not going to wake her just for that little extra protection. He lifts the covers and eases under them, right up next to Elena's body. She mumbles incoherently and repositions herself so that her head is resting on his chest. Damon's heart soars as he carefully wraps an arm around her. He closes his eyes, lets a soft smile take over his lips, and slowly drifts off to the most restful sleep he's ever had, wishing every day could end like this.

* * *

Sarah: aww, that was a sweet ending to the chapter, don't you agree? Don't worry, there is a lot more to come. And Damon had better soak up all the peace while he has it because in Mystic Falls, troubles always just around the corner. Reviews would be most appreciated.


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